I received an e-mail today from someone in my organization who said that entrepreneurs and business professionals really need help in management, sales, accounting, taxes and many other issues.  So far, so good–I couldn’t agree more!

Then he suggested that our organization would be so much better if we provided that kind of training. Whoa–stop!  Here’s where we part ways.  You see, I’ve heard that many times over the years.  It tends to come from groups that are struggling, and they’re looking for something to provide all the answers to a myriad of problems.  This sounds really good and I understand where the frustration is coming from–unfortunately, it just doesn’t work.

Many years ago as a business consultant, I saw a lot of my clients bounce around from one product or service to another.  They were chasing projects down rabbit trails because someone said they should be doing this element or that element of the business.  They didn’t specialize.  They tried to be all things to all people.  They ended up being good at nothing at all. 

When it comes to being a truly great organization, I believe that a  jack-of-all-trades is a master of none.   Instead, I believe that you should focus on your organization’s core competencies.   Do what you are good at, and do it better than anyone else.

There are many, many companies that are MUCH better at teaching business people about management, sales, taxes, etc.  My networking organization is not an expert in taxes or business management.  Organizations such as iLearningGlobal provide more content from more experts than we ever could.  We shouldn’t even try to be “the” expert in these areas.  In fact, we are not and never will be the leading organization on sales training.  Organizations such as Brian Tracy University are much better in this field than we are.  If we try to do that–we change our core business model and lose our focus.

Don’t try to be all things to all people.  Do what you are best at and do it better than anyone else in the world.  My company, BNI, is myopic.  We do one thing and, based on results (thousands of groups in dozens of countries), we do it better than anyone else.  We help people build their business through a structured referral networking program.  We are the biggest and the best at what we do, and we don’t try to be the best at other things.

Great companies know what business they are in, and they focus on improving that business every day.

OK, wait, let me rephrase that . . . ask me any business networking question–not just any question. If you’re thinking along the lines of embarrassing moments and possible blackmail material, then you’re out of luck on this one ( Sorry, I’ve still got disclaimers on the brain after my blog about the legal system! )

Anyway, I’m happy to announce that AskIvanMisner.com is now live, and this is your chance to ask me any question you have about how to build your personal and professional network.

On the third Tuesday of each month, beginning on Nov. 17 (10 a.m. Pacific/1 p.m. Eastern), I’ll be conducting a FREE, live teleseminar, co-hosted by my friend Alex Mandossian, where I’ll answer a handful of questions selected from those submitted on AskIvanMisner.com.

I’m encouraging anyone and everyone to log on and submit a question for me. You’ll be given the call-in number once you’ve submitted your question, and it’s perfectly fine with me if you invite any of your friends and/or business colleagues to join the FREE calls as well.

I’m looking forward to reading your questions, so log onto AskIvanMisner.com now and ask away!

Do you have balance in your life?  Personal and professional balance in our lives seems to be the ever-elusive dream for many of us.  Trying to balance home, work, health, spirituality and free time seems almost impossible.  It is something that businesspeople have told me for years.

Well, I am pleased to tell you that I believe I’ve found the answer to creating balance in your life.   Are you ready?  Write this down. Here it is:  Forget about balance, you’ll never have it!

I can hear you now . . . “What?!  No balance?!? That can’t be!  It’s just not right!” But wait . . . there IS good news.  Although I don’t think balance is possible, I do believe you can create harmony in your life.  This differentiation is more than just semantics.  It is a critical approach to looking at life that can free you up to see the world in a different way.

“Balance” assumes that we spend an equal amount of time in all or most areas of our life.  It is like the image of the scales (see the picture at right) where everything is completely in balance and equal.  It assumes that we must spend a certain portion of each week devoted in some equal measure to every item important in our life.

Well, the problem with that is that almost no one can really achieve that.  Especially entrepreneurs, professionals and salespeople.  We tend to live such hectic, busy lives that it is incredibly difficult to fit it all in.  Women often tell me that this issue is an even bigger problem for them.

So what do we do about this?  For me, it’s about creating harmony.  Just look at the image representing harmony  in this blog (see the yin yang symbol at right).  Even the image is lopsided when you look at one aspect at a time.  But it is the whole that feels complete.  This is a way to look at the issue that has personally worked for me.  Sometimes I work crazy, long hours for several days in a row.  Or I may be on the road traveling for business for many days at a time.  On the other hand, I am a husband and a father.  I need and want to be there for my family as well as have time for myself.  Long ago I figured out that daily balance is almost impossible.  But I found I could create harmony using a few core principles.

First, three simple words make a big difference to me: “Be here now.” Wherever you are, be there.  If you are at work, don’t think about the time you did not spend with the family the night before or what you should be doing with you significant other right now.  When you are at home, don’t think about the work you have to do at the office.  Wherever you are, be there . . . fully and completely.

Second, make sure to set aside time to do all the things that are truly important in your life. Yeah, I know everyone says that, but here’s my twist:  Be creative about how you manage this. For example, when I wrote my first book I didn’t want to be holed up in my office writing in the evening and not be available to my family.  I found a creative way to find that time that was in harmony with my family time.  A few evenings a month, I’d stay up with the family, put everyone to bed and then go into my office and start writing at 11 p.m. and work almost all night on my manuscript.  I’d catch a few hours of sleep and get into the office a little late to start my day.  I’m a late-night person and this worked for me.  It may not work for you.  However, my point is to be creative and inventive in finding ways YOU can accomplish what you need to do, yet still allow yourself to spend time doing the other things in your life that bring you harmony.  Nothing pleased me more than when I showed my children the book when it was published and they said to me . . . “When did you write that?!” They had no idea I was up late working several times a month.  That was harmony to me!

Third, find ways to integrate various elements of your life. For many years, I have spent weeks at a time up at my lake home in the mountains.  Each year, I spend a week or two working from the lake house remotely.  Now I bring up my staff and management team for short retreat/workdays.  It is a great way to combine my work life into a leisure environment.   Then, the last week or so, I take off COMPLETELY and spend time with my family.  By integrating my two worlds, I create a sense of harmony.

Last, remember this: when you are 70 years old, you are not going to wish you spent more time at the office. You don’t need to be a workaholic to be successful.

Focus on creating harmony in your life.  Be creative.  Don’t try to do the things I do or that someone else does.  Find ideas that work for you and the life you live.  Make the time to do the things that are important to you and be innovative.  Harmony is created where harmony is sought.  OK, that’s a bit “new age” sounding . . . but it is true.

I’m very interested to hear what you think of this approach and/or what do you do to create balance in your life.  Leave a comment and let me, and others reading this blog, know what has worked for you.

Have you ever wondered if men and women approach networking differently?

Well, I have. I’m actually in the process of gathering information to write a book about it with my friends Frank DeRaffele and Hazel Walker. A huge part of the book is going to be based on the findings of a survey we’re currently conducting. It’s the most comprehensive survey on gender and networking ever conducted, and we currently have 7,800 responses–which means we’re almost to our target of 8,000-10,000 responses!

The online survey only takes a few minutes, and I’d love to hear your opinions on Networking and the Sexes before the survey closes. You can rest assured that your opinions and comments are greatly appreciated and will be kept completely confidential; however, if you’d like to come back and leave a comment about what you thought of the survey, I’d be really interested to hear what you have to say!

If you live in Africa or South America, we especially need responses from people in those countries, so I’d really appreciate it if you’d take a few moments to participate and encourage your friends, family, and co-workers to participate as well.

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING LINK TO JOIN THE SURVEY NOW: http://www.SurveyMonkey.Com/s.asp?u=204762616512

Thanks!

OK, let me start by saying that my real beef is with civil litigators, not all lawyers and though I may use the term “lawyer” in my blog, it is the litigators I am really upset with. I also understand that we need rules of law and people to help guide us through them, such as my colleague here on the Entrepreneur.com Blog Network, Nina Kaufman, who writes the Making it Legal blog (Nina, please don’t hate me . . . for what I’m about to say).

Not all lawyers are litigators. However, all litigators are lawyers and it is that particular group of people that I think have made a mess out of our legal system.

The most outrageous legal cases can make it to court and cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to defend. I recently saw a case where a man decided  NOT to renew his services with a business, then sued the business for the loss of income he incurred by not renewing the service! That’s right. He chose to not renew, then sued because he lost income after not renewing the service! Sounds unbelievable, doesn’t it? Well, to just about any sane person, it is. Unfortunately, litigators can make the most incredible “legal” arguments out of the most outrageous claims, and judges feel compelled to let them go through the system.   Welcome to America!

All of this means that the defendants have to pay thousands–sometimes hundreds of thousands–of dollars to defend these insane claims.

This particular case that I mentioned above dragged on for years in the legal system and cost the defending parties more than $100,000 to defend! The primary defendant refused to settle at any cost. She was not going to buckle to extortion from this guy. However, two of the secondary defendants finally paid a few thousand dollars to make this extortionist and his litigator go away because they couldn’t afford the hundreds of thousands of dollars it would take to have this go all the way through court. The ONLY winner was the litigator.

When I hear stories like this, I can’t help but wonder if Shakespeare got it right in Henry VI when he said the first thing we do is get rid of the lawyers! (OK, I know, that’s not the exact quote but, I don’t want to be sued by someone saying that I was threatening bodily harm to this esteemed group of professionals).

In preparation for writing this blog, I did some research on Shakespeare’s quote and I read one legal website that wrote that Shakespeare’s statement was actually a defense of lawyers because the comment was made by criminals. Therefore they (the criminals) just wanted the “good guys” (the lawyers) out of the way.  Wow, and we wonder why the legal system is a mess. Sorry, only lawyers could argue that the quote from Shakespeare was a compliment!

Well, I believe in solutions and not just describing problems. So here are some possible solutions. First, I believe that there should be mandatory mediation between parties before any lawsuit can ever be filed (the litigators will hate this one)! From personal experience (and contracts that I’ve done), this often works). The problem is, anyone can sue anyone for anything before there is any face-to-face time with a professional mediator. Second, I believe that 100 percent of the time, the losing party should pay the winning party’s legal fees. Furthermore, I think the losing litigator should share in paying this fee! This will make the extortionists and litigators very cautious about the ridiculous lawsuits that are filed.  Watch how many crazy lawsuits cease if the lawyers pushing the process have to pay something if they lose!

Hey, these are only ideas–there may be many better ones out there. I just know one thing. Our legal system is a mess, and it’s going to take a sledgehammer and a lot of work to fix it. What are your recommendations?

OK, I feel better now.  Oh, wait–I forgot something important:

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If something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on.

Today I am happy to announce that my “Networking Now” blog made it onto Accredited Online Degrees’ list of the “100 Best Blogs to Hone Your Entrepreneurial Instinct” in the category of blogs that aid in growing your business.

You can find this blog listed as No. 32 on the list, but more than that, I want you all to know about the list because it is a fantastic resource! In addition to learning about different blog sites in the “Growing Your Business” category, you can find several different educational and informational blogs in the areas of Starting Up, Money, Marketing, Success Stories, Small Business News, Internet Entrepreneurs, Women Entrepreneurs, Social Entrepreneurship and Web Tools & Resources.

I spent some time clicking on the links to several different blogs I’d never heard of before, and I think the entire list of links is extremely useful. I encourage all of my blog readers to click here and check out the list because there are some truly great blogs listed that you’ll want to be sure to check out!

Like the intro to the list says, “Whether you’re already running a business, or just thinking of starting one . . . it is necessary to look at several areas of the entrepreneurial process and develop expertise to excel in each and every business venture.” This list provides you with links to information on all aspects of business and entrepreneurship–and it’s FREE. So what are you waiting for?  Start clicking!

Today’s blog is a unique one because normally you only hear from me; but this entry, which talks about building relationships, was fittingly co-written with my wife Beth, the person in my life with whom I have the strongest relationship.

This summer, our family took a multi-day, small ship tour of the Great Barrier Reef. The first night we noticed that the anchor being used to secure our small ship in the middle of the Coral Sea was quite small compared with the size of the ship.

The second night we were anchored off Hope Island, some very strong winds began to kick up. Our captain started the engines and backed the ship up, letting out more length of chain to the anchor. Curious (and admittedly a bit concerned), we asked him how it was possible for such a small anchor to hold the ship in place with the winds blowing against it so agressively.

“It’s the chain that’s holding the ship, not the anchor,” he informed us. Apparently, after the anchor is lowered, the captain looks to the first mate, who signals from the prow which direction the chain is lying on the bottom of the sea. The captain can then maneuver into the right position and let out the necessary amount of chain to hold the ship according to the particular conditions at that time.

This particular night, with the winds growing stronger, the captain realized that he needed to let out more chain.

It struck us that this dynamic is relevant to networking groups. You see, a networking group’s anchor is its system, its process of doing business. However, it’s not actually the anchor (the system/process) that dictates the strength of a networking group.

Take a look at your networking group and think about the links, or relationships, you have formed with the individual members. How many “links” does your chain have? Do you have strong relationships with all the other members in the group, or are you closely linked with some but disconnected and detached from others for whatever reason?

So how do we go about adding more links (aka building more relationships) so we can let out more chain during times when the economic winds have strengthened against our businesses? We need to get serious about developing stronger relationships with every member of our networking group, even the ones we might not think have the contacts we want, or perhaps are in a business that isn’t exactly symbiotic with ours.

We naturally form relationships with those businesses that are closely related to ours, but what do we do about those members whose businesses are totally out of sync with ours, our members who seem to be unable to provide qualified referrals to us? Try scheduling one-to-one meetings with those members. Spending the time to have one-to-one meetings with each and every member of your group helps you develop a longer and stronger chain of relationships. Each person in your group is one of the links that lengthens that chain.

The wisdom of laying down a longer chain to strengthen the ability of the anchor to hold strong is critical for the success of yournetworking group.

So starting this week, try making it your main focus to develop your relationship chain within your networking group. We guarantee it will be what anchors your business and your networking group for longevity, despite economic flucuations.

Experienced networkers know that the fastest way to expand and enhance their network is to regularly attend gatherings where networking takes place. Having many people with overlapping interests within arm’s reach facilitates the process of making connections based on mutual benefit.

While flipping recently through Masters of Networking, a book I released back in 2000, I ran across an article contributed by my friends Cindy Mount and Jeremy Allen. The article outlines a great, six-part foundation for success at networking events, so I thought I’d share their outline with all of you here.

Attending the Networking Event

As every good networker knows, one of the fastest ways to grow your business quickly and successfully is through word-of-mouth marketing. That’s the fundamental reason networkers attend networking events. And people who have made a science of systematic networking keep six essentials in mind. Each time they attend an event, they have 1. a purpose, 2. a goal and 3. a plan, and they make sure to 4. execute the plan, 5.  evaluate their efforts and 6. follow up on all contacts.

1. Purpose

What’s your reason for attending the event? Do you expect to show up, shake hands and exchange business cards just to be sociable? No . . . your reason for being at the event should be because you see networking as a complete philosophy of doing business and living your life, and because you see that helping others is the best route to helping yourself. Keep this in mind at all times.

2. Goal

What is your destination? What do you need to accomplish at the event? What do you expect the outcome to be? How many contacts do you need, and in what kind of businesses? Do you need to become a gatekeeper as a step in obtaining your desired outcome? Think of professions, trades or business owners who would most likely hear of or see people who need your service or products, and target these people for your networking efforts.

3. Plan

Once you know your destination, you need a map to show you how to get there. A good networking plan will include these things:

Research. Whom do you have to meet? Where do they have lunch? What do their company’s annual plans say? What are some of the trends within your target industry?

Competition. Who are your competitors? What is their market share, and how much market share do you expect to capture? What edge does your competition have? What are your strengths and advantages?

Resources. What resources do you need, and where will you get them? Do you need guidance? Are your listening skills good enough to get you your money’s worth?

Backup. Do you need to recruit new contacts or associates who can take over some of your duties or help you reach your goals faster?

Schedule. How much time have you given yourself to achieve your goals? Do you have contingency plans in case you encounter problems along the way?

4. Execution

Plans don’t work unless they’re implemented. To be successful, you must begin executing your plan. Use a time management planner and project organizer that can show you a week at a glance. Mark dates when you expect certain results, then work backward to monthly, weekly and daily completion of specific objectives.

5. Evaluation

As you reach each checkpoint in your plan, stop and evaluate your results. If you find that a particular networking group is not meeting your goals, adjust your plans. You may need a new way to work the group, or you may need a new group. You may also need to consider learning a new skill or getting some help to meet your goals.

6. Follow-Up

Make complete notes on everybody you meet, keep their business cards and brochures handy, and think about the potential of each new contact you’ve made. Begin making appointments to meet and work with these contacts as soon as practical. Don’t let a recent introduction grow cold and be forgotten.

The key word in “networking” is “work.” It takes time, effort and patience, but the payoff of powerful networking will be a personal marketing strategy that accelerates the achievement of your goals.

I just posted a blog this past Monday on the “Seven Key Aptitudes of Abundance Intelligence,” as outlined by my good friend Kim George, and if you’d like to further your education on how to achieve and maintain an abundance mind-set, the perfect opportunity is coming up next week.

As one of the Expo’s speakers, I’m inviting you to be among the first to explore the Virtual Abundance Expo. From July 27-30, more than 12 of the the world’s thought leaders, teachers and inspirational luminaries will come to your home or office via the internet for an entire week.

You will hear from leaders such as Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Alex Mandossian, Marci Shimoff, Bill Harris, Scott Martineau, Lisa Nichols and more, all of whom will be sharing their wisdom and insight on creating more abundance in your life.

• Get any question answered about any abundance topic imaginable.

• Switch your mindset from scarcity to abundance in every area of your life

• Create a greater abundance mind-set and improve your happiness, performance, networks, thinking, marketing, finance, values, beliefs and every other important area of your life

Go to http://www.TheVirtualAbundanceExpo.com to sign up for the Virtual Abundance Expo.

I was speaking throughout Japan last week to BNI networking groups and the public. Before leaving the country, I took my daughter to a little restaurant called Gonpachi, which was near the hotel we were staying at. It was a nice little place in Tokyo with great food and service, but what really got my attention was the reception we received when we entered the dining room. As we entered the room, one of the waitresses yelled “irasshaimasei!” Whereupon all the patrons joined in by yelling “irasshaimasei!” I asked my daughter, “What in the world?” are they yelling at us, to which she replied: “They are more or less saying, “Welcome to the restaurant!” I thought, wow, that’s pretty impressive. What a nice touch.

I sat back and watched as patrons flowed into the restaurant, and with each group of people the waitress and the patrons would yell out, “Welcome to the restaurant!” in Japanese. As people slowly trickled out of the restaurant, they yelled, “arigatou gozaimashita!” which means, “Thank you very much” to everyone as they left.

Isn’t that what a good networking group should be like? When you visit a networking organization and the members say (through their actions and words), “Welcome to our group” and “Thanks for visiting us” with enthusiasim and genuine interest, you just have to come back to the group again.

This truly is an important secret to a good network. Make visitors feel welcome! When people feel welcome, they want to come back.

OK, if you start yelling “irasshaimasei!” at them when they enter the room, you might not actually get the response I’m thinking about here but . . . you get the idea. Make people feel welcome, and they’ll return. That, my friends, is the sign of a great restaurant as well as a great networking group.